


Visions of Death

by ArabellaTurner



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Canon - Movie, Canon Compliant, Eddie Lives, F/M, Fix-It, Happy Ending, Internalized Homophobia, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Canon Fix-It, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Stan stays dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-07
Updated: 2019-09-10
Packaged: 2020-10-11 12:11:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20545964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArabellaTurner/pseuds/ArabellaTurner
Summary: While trapped in the deadlights, Richie was forced to watch helplessly as the man he loved most in all the world died in his arms and left him alone and broken. But the deadlights are only visions. They are not the only future attainable.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Eddie and Richie deserve happiness and I intend to give it to them! I only saw the movie once, so I probably don't have the quotes exactly right, but it should be close enough. Just let my babies be happy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "They show you dark glimpses of possible futures. I saw all of us die so many times and in so many horrible ways. You saw something horrible too, didn’t you?"

Richie smiled sadly as he stared at the faded “E” in the wood. With a trembling hand, he brought his knife up and began to freshen it up. He wanted to make sure the marks never disappeared. Just like his love would never disappear.

Richie was in love with Eddie. He knew that for a fact now and was no longer afraid to admit it. He loved Eddie Kasprak and wanted the world to know. If only it wasn’t too late for Eddie to know himself.

A deep sadness started to seep through Richie’s body once more. He tried to stand up, but found that he could no longer move. It was like some invisible force was grabbing onto him.

“Rich! Richie!” he heard a distant voice cry out. “Eds?” he thought suddenly. Was that his Eds calling out to him? No, it couldn’t be. Eddie was dead.

“I did it, Richie!” the voice continued. “I think I killed It! I really think I did!”

Suddenly Richie was back on the ground beneath Derry. An excited Eddie was sitting on top of him, shaking him. What was going on? Why was he back here? What was...

Richie suddenly realized when and where he was and grabbed Eddie mid-sentence and rolled. The two of them toppled over and landed with a thud in the cavern where Eddie had gone flying last time.

“Eds!” Richie cried out. “Are you okay?” he asked, panicked. “Wha-?” Eddie began, before looking up and seeing the claw waving in the air. He cowered into Richie for a second before realizing that it couldn’t reach him from where he was.

“I didn’t kill It,” he said sadly. Eddie stared miserably at Richie, all his fire from a few seconds before flickered out. “It didn’t work. I must not have believed hard enough,” he apologized.

Richie shook his head and threw his arms around Eddie. “You saved my life,” he whispered. “I was trapped there and you brought me back. I’d be dead without you,” Richie assured Eddie.

“And I’d be dead without you,” Eddie protested, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “I told you Richie. I’m just a bur-“ Richie grabbed Eddie’s shoulders, cutting him off before he could start beating himself up.

“I only knew what to do because I lost you last time,” he argued. Eddie stared at him in confusion. “Last time I wasn’t ready for it and you died. We defeated It, but lost you. It was horrible! I don’t know how I’m back now, but when I saw where we were, I just...”

Richie choked back a sob. He had no idea how he had been granted this second chance. He was grateful for it, but he was terrified it was all just a dream.

Suddenly, Richie felt a hand squeeze his shoulder. He looked up to and found all of the other Losers gathered around him and Eddie. They must have run over to make sure he and Eddie were all right.

“You saw it too, didn’t you?” Bev asked gently, giving his shoulder another squeeze. Richie frowned. “Saw what?” he asked, confused. “The deadlights,” Beverly explained. “They show you dark glimpses of possible futures. I saw all of us die so many times and in so many horrible ways. You saw something horrible too, didn’t you?”

Richie nodded miserably and pulled Eddie in close. “We lost Eddie,” he sobbed. “We defeated It, but lost Eddie. Eddie saved my life, figured out how to defeat It, then died while we were all fighting. He died, Bev! We...” Richie broke off again into another sob as Eddie wrapped his arms tightly around Richie in return.

“The visions are only a possible future,” Beverly comforted, wrapping her own arms around both of the men. “If Eddie is okay now, then it seems you adverted that one.”

Richie nodded wordlessly, his face still pressed tightly up against Eddie. Did this mean that he really did have a second chance here? Was Eddie really going to live?

A horrible screech from It reminded Richie that it wasn’t going to be that simple. Mike seemed to realize it too. “You said we defeated It in your vision, right?” he asked, bringing everyone back to the task at hand. 

Richie nodded solemnly. “Eddie told us how to do it,” he explained. “Right now It is a giant monster, so even a powerful weapon isn’t strong enough. But when It took the form of a leper, Eddie was very nearly able to choke him out, all on his own.” Riche paused for a moment to beam at Eddie. 

Mike’s eyes lit up with understanding. “So it’s only as powerful as the form it takes,” he realized. Richie nodded. “So if we can shrink it down to something less dangerous, we can defeat it,” Bev chimed in.

“The tunnel!” Bill exclaimed. “If we lure it through the tunnel, it will need to shrink down to fit. Is that what we did in your vision?” he asked, turning to Richie expectantly, yet Richie only shook his head and grinned. “It’s simpler than even that,” he continued. “It’s power comes from our fear. We just need to believe it’s not that strong.” 

The Losers looked around at each other for a moment before understanding sank in. “So then, what are we waiting for?” Ben asked. “Let’s bring this clown down to size!”

————

The battle played out much the same as it had in Richie’s visions, only this time, Eddie was there beside them. A part of Richie wanted to tell Eddie to stand back and seek cover. He had already done his part and didn’t need to put himself in danger again.

But Richie also knew that he could never do that. Eddie was so proud of himself when he thought he had killed the creature and so sad he realized It was still alive. Richie wanted to make sure Eddie had the satisfaction of helping to deliver the finishing blow. Eddie had spent too long incorrectly believing that he was weak and Richie would be damned if he endorsed it too.

Richie watched as It flickered between all the forms it used to torment them while the Losers shouted a volley of insults back at the creature. Everything seemed to be going perfectly until It took on a new form that Richie had never seem before. As the grotesque combination of spider and Sonia Kaspbrak stared back at him, Richie opened his mouth, ready to let out some stupid joke about sex. Only before he could, It reeled back as a bottle of pills smacked against its head.

“They’re called ‘placebos,’ dumbass!” Eddie shouted. His face was contorted in righteous indignation and Richie swore he was staring at an angel. Richie’s heart swelled in pride as he took the other man in. Eddie was clearly no longer afraid, or if he was still afraid, he wasn’t going to let it stop him. This was the man that Richie had fallen in love with, the Eddie he believed in with all his heart.

So the battle raged on, It’s agonized wails increasing with every new insult, until eventually the creature was nothing more than a shriveled up fetus with an ugly clown head. Richie watched in satisfaction as Mike reached down and ripped its heart out.

As if one, the Losers all reached out together and dug their fingers into the still-beating lump of muscle. As Richie’s fingers dug deep into the heart, he felt Eddie’s brush up against his. The smaller man’s face was contorted into rage, no doubt in a stubborn refusal to be beaten by the disgustingness of the situation.

Instinctively, Richie grabbed Eddie’s hand, his fingers stabbing further though the stringy muscle in the process. Eddie jumped for a second, then realized what was happening. He hesitated for a moment, but before Richie could let go, Eddie’s fingers tightened around Richie’s in return.

From the corner, It yelled out in agony once more. Encouraged, Richie and Eddie squeezed tighter, wriggling their hands around to cause more damage. The feeling of tearing apart the squishy muscle was disgusting to even Richie, but they didn’t stop.

Then, with a final cry, It and its heart began to disintegrate. The shriveled black pieces floated up into the air surrounding the Losers. Richie stood for a moment in awe, taking in the feeling of victory combined with the warmth of Eddie’s hand. 

The suddenly the cavern began to shake. “Run!” Richie cried, snapping out of his trance. He took off, still clinging tightly to Eddie’s hand. The other Losers followed less than a step behind.

With only seconds to spare, the Losers managed to scramble back outside. The watched in awe as the old Neibolt house shuddered the collapsed in on itself. Richie stood, transfixed by the sight. Last time all he had wanted to do was run back in there and grab Eddie, but now Eddie was standing beside him, their hands still interlocked.

Then, before Richie knew what he was doing, he was kissing Eddie. The kiss was sort of disgusting due to the grime and dirt covering their faces, but Richie didn’t care. This was Eddie, after all. It was his living, breathing Eddie and that was all he needed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "But if it was right, then why did it feel so wrong? And if kissing Richie was wrong, then why did it feel so right?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - contains homophobic thoughts and terms. 
> 
> I'm so sorry for this guys! I promise that there will be a happy ending to this story. They just have some issues they need to work out first!

Eddie sank deeply into the kiss, enjoying the feeling of the greedy lips tugging at his own. This was nothing at all like the wet, sloppy kisses he got from Myra. Wait. Myra.

Eddie pulled back suddenly, realizing in horror what he was doing. He was cheating on his wife. And with a man no less.

The look of pain that flashed in Richie’s eyes when Eddie pulled away was heartbreaking. Eddie knew that he had a look of disgust plastered across his face and he was sure that it hurt Richie a lot.

But it was wrong to be kissing Richie, wasn’t it? Wasn’t it? Tears welled up in Eddie’s eyes. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. He then turned and ran away.

He ran until he was out of breath and panting. He hadn’t really thought about where he was going before, but as he looked up, he saw his old house starring back at him.

Eddie looked back at the road he had run down, half hoping to see Richie running towards him, but the road was empty. Eddie didn’t blame Richie though. After supporting him, protecting him, then finally kissing him, Richie deserved so much better than just being abandoned. Yet Eddie was scared. Now that the battle was over, he had to return to his normal life again, right? He had to go home to Myra and her smothering love. That was the right thing to do, wasn’t it?

But if it was right, then why did it feel so wrong? And if kissing Richie was wrong, then why did it feel so right?

Eddie sank down to the ground, ignoring how dirty the pavement was. He was filthy already anyways. What was a little bit more dirt going to do to him now? In his mind, he could hear his mom yelling at him to stand up. Didn’t he know how many diseases he could catch like that? And what if a car came by and ran him over?

But Eddie tuned the words out. His mom was dead now and she couldn’t control him any longer. She had no more power over him. Eddie had burned his inhaler and attacked It with his pills. He was dirty and injured, but still alive. He wasn’t the fragile boy she and Myra believed him to be any longer. Perhaps he never had been.

Richie never seemed to think that he was. Richie said that he was braver than he thought. He trusted Eddie and encouraged him to stand his ground and join in on the fray. Eddie’s mom always thought that Richie was a horrible influence on Eddie. And maybe in some ways he was. Richie encouraged Eddie to believe in himself.

Eddie slowly stood back up and began walking up towards the house. One by one, he gradually climbed the steps up to the front door until he was standing right in front of it. He didn’t know what he was hoping to find on the other side. There was no one there waiting for him, yet he felt his hand drawn to the doorbell. 

He just wanted to see her once more. He wanted to stand there in front of his mom and show her what he had become. He wanted to hear her yelling at him and telling him to never see any of his friends again. He wanted to hear her screech about “that dirty boy” Richie who always filled Eddie’s head with dangerous ideas and spread his germs everywhere.

Then he wanted to slam the door in her face and walk away. He wanted to tell her that she was wrong. He wasn’t fragile and his friends were the best part of him. Just because they believed in him, didn’t mean that they weren’t there for him.

Hell, Richie was constantly looking out for him. At even the slightest hint of danger, Richie was calling his name and looking around frantically for him. And whenever Eddie was in pain, Richie reached out to ground him. Richie had nearly broken down at the thought of losing him, yet he had still let Eddie fight. Why had he still let Eddie fight? Why did he trust Eddie so much if he also cared about him so much?

Eddie slowly lowered his hand. There was no point in ringing that doorbell. His mom wasn’t waiting on the other side and even if she was, Eddie didn’t have the strength to tell her off. Especially not after abandoning Richie.

______

Richie stood stock still as Eddie took off. A voice inside his head screamed at him to run after Eddie, but he quickly silenced that voice. 

“I hope you’re happy now,” another, crueler voice chided him. “Look at what you’ve done. This is what you get for being a faggot. You’ve gone and scared him away. And all because you couldn’t keep your big, fat, gay crush to yourself and just leave Eddie alone. Of course he didn’t want you to do that! You saw the way he looked at you. That was pure disgust in his eyes. Disgust for you, Richie Tozier. You are disgusting. Your are just a disgusting little faggot and you will never amo-“

“Richie!” Bev’s voice cut through Richie’s thoughts. “Wha-?” he began. “Why are you still standing here?” she asked. Richie looked at her in horror. Oh god, she hated him now too. Probably all of the Losers did. He had kissed their friend without permission. He had forced himself onto Eddie and hurt him.

“I’m sorry,” Richie apologized. “I’ll go now,” he offered, turning around to walk away. “He went the other way,” Bev pointed out. “I know,” Richie agreed. “And right now I’m sure he wants me to stay as far away from him as possible. But it’s okay, you know? He’s alive now. That’s enough for me. As long as he’s alive and happy, I’ll be happy too.” 

Richie choked back a sob as he spoke. He would be happy for Eddie. He had to be. It’s not like he ever actually had a chance with the other man. No. It was enough to know that Eddie was okay now.

“It’s time I leave this shithole and head home. I need to return to the real world again. What’s left of my fans after my last performance are probably wondering where I am. Can’t keep them waiting any longer, you know?” 

Richie then turned and began to walk away. “That’s not what I-“ Bev began before a hand on her shoulder cut her off. Bev looked questioningly at Ben. “But he’s making a mistake,” she protested, but Ben only shook his head. 

“They’re not ready yet,” he told her. “They still need to work things out for themselves. Give them time.” “But what if they forget about each other?” Bev protested. “What if we all part ways and forget about each other? I don’t want them to lose each other again. I can’t let them lose each other again!”  
Tears welled up in Beverly’s eyes. “I’m already so scared I’m going to lose you and I plan on staying by your side when I leave. If they don’t stay together, then what chance do they have?” 

Mike placed a hand on Beverly’s other shoulder. “We won’t let them forget again. I won’t let any of us forget again if we don’t want to.” “But you can’t still stay here!” Bill protested. “You’ve been haunted by this town for so long. Isn’t it time you escaped to your own happy story? Didn’t you want to move to Florida?”

Mike smiled a little sadly, but simply shrugged. “Florida was just some place. You guys are my real home. If I can stay in contact with you, then it’s worth it to stay here.”

Bev, Ben, and Bill all stared sadly at Mike. How had their happy ending turned sour so quickly? They had just defeated It and saved the day. Why were they all feeling so empty all of the sudden?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Richie opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to force words out. Who would have thought that the Trashmouth could have been rendered speechless?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - Myra is an abusive and manipulate piece of shit

The first thing Eddie did when he made it back to the inn was shower. His shower curtain was missing now due to his fight with Bowers, but he was too tired and drained to care. He just wanted to clean himself of the grime coating his body and the depression coating his heart. 

Once his skin was scrubbed red and raw, Eddie realized he couldn’t keep hiding under the water. It wasn’t doing anything for his heart other than putting off the inevitable. And he could only put it off for so long.

With a miserable sigh, Eddie picked up his phone and scrolled through his meager contact list to find Myra’s name. He didn’t really want to talk to her, but felt he had no choice. He winced when he saw the twenty missed calls and 104 unread messages. He had only been gone for two days, but Myra was clearly furious with him. 

Not that he could blame her. In his short time away, Eddie had put his life in danger on multiple occasions, refused to contact her, and even cheated on her. Any wife would be mad at her husband for behaving the way he had.

The phone barely let off a single ring before Eddie’s ears were filled with Myra’s whiney voice. “Eddie-bear!” she cried. “Why haven’t you answered any of my calls or messages? I’ve been worried sick about you! I very nearly called the police to find you! How could you do this to me? Don’t you love me at all?” Myra sobbed.

The guilt hit Eddie like a wave. How could he have hurt his wife like this? She was so worried about him. She was so hurt by his actions. “I’m sorry honey. I didn’t mean to make you worry. I just had to deal with some ghosts from the past. I’ll be heading home again soon,” Eddie promised.

Myra let out a little humph. “I just can’t believe you would do something like this to me,” she complained. “You’re delicate, Eddie. You need to take care of yourself. What if something had happened to you? What would I do if you got hurt? I don’t want you running off like this again, do you understand? Once you get home, you’re staying there unless I go with you.”

Eddie bit his lip and took a deep breath in through his nose. He wanted to argue. What Myra was asking him to do was unreasonable and unfair, but he had caused her to panic. And wasn’t she just worried about him?

Once more, he heard Richie’s voice calling out his name. He remembered the warmth of Richie’s arms wrapped around him as Richie sobbed. He had scared Richie so much too. He had scared all the Losers, yet none of them held him back. 

“Eddie-bear? Do you understand?” Myra’s voice cut through Eddie’s thoughts. Eddie sighed and looked down. “Yes Marty, I understand,” he conceded, hoping the pet-name would convince Myra he really meant it. “Good,” Myra replied. “Now come home, Eddie. I miss you.” Eddie closed his eyes and took another deep breath. “I’m coming, Marty,” he promised. “Next flight home. I swear it.” 

Myra made an approving noise. “I love you, Eddie,” she told him. Eddie swallowed, a lump forming in his throat. “I love you too, Myra,” he replied before hanging up. “I love you,” he repeated again to his empty room.

________

After returning to the inn and showering, Richie made his way to Eddie’s room. The shower had cleared Richie’s head somewhat and he realized that it would be stupid to leave without talking to Eddie once more. Even if they couldn’t be lovers, there was no reason why they couldn’t part ways as friends. 

Richie stopped outside the door to knock, but paused when he heard Eddie talking. Since Richie couldn’t hear anyone responding to Eddie, he assumed that Eddie was on the phone.

Richie’s heart contracted when he realized what Eddie was saying, He was planning on leaving soon and heading back to his wife. Only he didn’t sound happy about it at all.

Eddie hadn’t said very much about his wife in the short time they had been reunited, but none of what he said had been good. Richie had trouble believing that Eddie was happy in his relationship, but now he was going to return to that miserable life.

Richie continued to stand outside Eddie’s door for minutes after the phone call ended, his hand frozen, unable to knock. He continued to stand there through the sounds of Eddie packing, then dropping something, then banging his head and swearing. He remained frozen as Eddie threw his stuff back on his bed and stormed to the door, mumbling something about needing a drink.

It wasn’t until the door swung open and he was staring face to face with Eddie that Richie finally moved again.

“What are you doing here?” Eddie asked. His voice was surprisingly soft, all things considered. “Uh…” Richie opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to force words out. Who would have thought that the Trashmouth could have been rendered speechless?

Eddie seemed to take pity on Richie and smiled sadly at the other man. “I’m going to grab a drink now,” he commented. “Want to join me?” Richie nodded in agreement and silently turned to follow Eddie, his voice still missing.

When the two men made it down to the inn’s lobby, they found the other Losers already gathered there, drinks in hand. “I see you all had the same idea,” Eddie said, walking over to the bar and pouring himself some bourbon. He wasn’t sure where the bartender was, but he figured he could just leave some money on the counter when he was done. It looked like the other Losers were planning on doing the same thing.

Richie followed closely behind Eddie, grabbing a bottle of vodka and pouring himself a glass. Eddie raised an eyebrow at the action, acknowledging that Richie had helped himself to way more than a single serving, but Richie only shrugged.

The two men sat down next to each other, a little bit away from the other Losers. The room had fallen silent and the tension was palpable now. Eddie looked around uncomfortably, unsure how to break it to the others that he would be leaving first thing the next morning. He was sure that they all wanted to spend a little time together before parting ways, but Eddie had a life he needed to return to.

“I could use something to eat, what about the rest of you?” Beverly asked, breaking the silence. “Uh…” Ben began before being cut off by Beverly. “Come on, Ben. Let’s go grab something. We’ll bring it back to the inn and we can all eat it together later. That’s going to be much nicer than going to a restaurant.”

Beverly stood up and held a hand out to Ben who took it quickly. He was pretty sure that Beverly just wanted to give Richie and Eddie a moment alone together, but he was grateful that Bev wanted to include him in her plans. Ever since they had saved each other back in the Neibolt house, the two of them had been pretty much inseparable.

“I should probably check in on the library. I should make sure that whatever is happening with Bowers’ body doesn’t come back to haunt us,” Mike declared. “I’ll c-come with you,” Bill offered, standing up suddenly. He and Mike exchanged a quick look before hurrying off. Beverly and Ben followed closely behind.

Richie and Eddie exchanged a look between them. “You know, if I didn’t know the others better, I would think that they were making up excuses to get out of here,” Richie said with an eye roll. Eddie snorted in response, almost spilling his drink.

The two men exchanged a small smile before settling back into silence. “Look,” Richie finally began. “What I did today was-“ “It’s fine,” Eddie interrupted. “You were just caught up in the moment, I get it. I’m not mad at you for kissing me.” Richie shook his head. “I still shouldn’t have forced myself on you like that,” he apologized.

Eddie smiled weakly at his friend. “Are we still friends?” he asked nervously. Richie’s eyes filled with tears. “Of course, Eds,” he swore. “You are my best friend in the world and nothing will ever change that!” 

Eddie smiled gratefully at his friend. He knew that this wasn’t what Richie wanted for them, but he was relieved he was willing to leave them like this. “Thanks Rich,” he replied. “You’re my best friend too.” 

”If you ever need anything, let me know,” Richie offered. “I’ll always be there for you.” Eddie nodded and smiled, but his eyes welled up with tears. “I’ve missed you, Richie,” he admitted. “I’ve missed you too, Eds.”

The two men leaned in for a tight hug. “This is enough,” Richie told himself once more as he breathed in Eddie’s comforting scent. “Eddie is alive and well and willing to be my friend again. That’s so much more than I could have ever dreamed of before. It’s enough.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Richie wasn’t really sure what his next steps were. Back in his deadlight vision, the other Losers had seemed to be able to move on with their lives, but Richie really hadn’t. He guessed that his best course of action was to return to LA and try to pick up the pieces of his job.”

Eddie couldn’t help but laugh a little as he stared at his multiple suitcases. It seemed so stupid now to have packed so much for such a short amount of time. And it had been such a short amount of time. He wished that he could stay longer. The Losers had only just started to catch back up with each other and now he was leaving again.

But Eddie had promised Myra that he would return home. And it wasn’t like he would never hear from them again. The night before, they had all exchanged numbers and promised to stay in touch. There was a little uncertainty to the promise since no one was sure how long they would remember each other for, but Mike swore that he wouldn’t let them forget each other.

Eddie hoped that Mike would really be able to keep that promise. He didn’t ever want to lose this feeling. He couldn’t just go back to the man he was before.

As Eddie made his way down to the lobby, he was greeted by five eager pairs of arms and many tears. It truly was an incredible sendoff. “I’ll text you guys all the time, I promise,” Eddie swore as he pulled away from the group hug. “I’ll call you all too. I’ve missed you all so much. I’ll miss you again when I’m gone.”

“We’ll miss you too, Eddie,” Beverly said, wiping a tear from her cheek. “I’d t-tell you to take care of yourself, b-but I know you already always do that,” Bill added. Eddie smiled at his friends. He noticed that Bill’s stutter seemed to be a lot less noticeable than when he had first arrived back in Derry. Eddie hoped that it was a sign that he was in a better mental state and not a sign that he was forgetting. Eddie couldn’t bear to lose everyone again for good.

“If you ever happen to end up in LA,” Richie began. “I’ll make sure to give your mom a visit,” Eddie finished for him. Richie’s eyes filled up with tears and he let out a strangled sound. “I’ll be counting on it,” Richie agreed. The two men hugged each other once more before Eddie finally broke away and made his way to his car.

Richie watched silently as the love of his life climbed in the car and drove away. He didn’t trust himself to try and speak.

______

After Eddie left, the rest of the Losers began to make departure plans as well. With one of them already gone, it felt easier to return to their own lives.

Richie wasn’t really sure what his next steps were. Back in his deadlight vision, the other Losers had seemed to be able to move on with their lives, but Richie really hadn’t. He guessed that his best course of action was to return to LA and try to pick up the pieces of his job. He just wasn’t really sure if he could still be funny the way he was before. Although, Richie wasn’t sure if he really had been funny in a long time. Everything he did and said now was someone else’s words, not his own.

Although he had made the Losers laugh. Richie smiled at the memory of their happy faces. The jokes he told to his friends were nothing like the ones he told on stage, but maybe that was for the better. Richie wasn’t the man he had been before returning to Derry, so why should he pretend like nothing had changed?

With his mind now made up, Richie found himself returning to the kissing bridge once more. He knelt down in front of his old declaration of love and ran his fingers along the letters. They were faded and shallow once more. For a moment, Richie wondered if it was wrong to repair them when Eddie didn’t return his feelings.

Yet he supposed he carved them without any real hope for Eddie’s love in return. And maybe they weren’t really for Eddie anyways. Richie pulled a small switchblade from his pocket and began deepening the letters. He was done hiding and done being afraid.

______

That evening, the Losers received text confirmation from Eddie that he had made it home safely. It was a generic message sent to all of them together and when Richie called, it went straight into voicemail. It made sense, Richie supposed, since Eddie and Myra were probably busy reuniting, but it still really hurt. And Richie refused to let his mind wander onto what ‘reuniting’ might entail.

The next day, Richie returned home as well. Home for Richie was a messy, empty apartment with only spoiled takeout in the fridge, but at least it was his. And soon his career would be his as well. The entire trip back, Richie had worked on a new act. He wasn’t sure if his manager would approve of it, but he didn’t care. These were his words and his jokes and he would be damned if he didn’t tell them.

______

The next few days were a personal hell for Richie. Between Stan’s heartbreaking letter and the chewing out he got from his manager, it took all of Richie’s self control not to drink himself into oblivion. But he knew that if he wanted to convince his manager to let him perform his own act, he had to appear responsible and in the right state of mind.

Eddie did eventually return Richie’s call, apologizing for the delay. Apparently disappearing for a few days right after crashing your car was also not such a great move and Eddie was now dealing with work issues, insurance claims, and a fiercely overprotective wife who had forced him to go to the hospital the second he stepped back into their house with a bandage on his cheek.

“Jesus Eds,” Richie had told him. “That sounds like a right miserable time.” Eddie snorted. “You have no idea Rich,” he admitted. “How’s life going for you back in LA?” Eddie then asked, hoping to move the subject away from him. “It’s going,” Richie replied. “My manager is pretty pissed at my disappearance and the tabloids have not been particularly kind, but I’m starting to piece things back together.”

Eddie remained quiet for a moment, debating what to say. “Are you happy with your life the way things are?” he finally asked. Richie took in a sharp breath. “Where was this coming from?” he wondered. “I wasn’t,” he admitted. “I wasn’t happy with my life at all before. I didn’t admit it to anyone, even myself, but I was miserable. But I’m going to try and change things.”

A wave of emotions crashed over Eddie. He didn’t know whether to feel sorry for Richie for his unhappiness, proud of him for his hope for the future, or jealous of him for being able to improve his life. 

Realizing that Eddie didn’t know how to respond, Richie spoke up once more. “You used to watch me perform, right?” he asked. Eddie chuckled. “Yeah. It was one of my guilty pleasures. Myra never liked you much, but she never found anything so bad about you that she had reason to stop me from watching. Honestly, I wasn’t really sure why I liked watching you so much. Most of your jokes sucked and a few were sort of sexist and homophobic.”

Richie winced at Eddie’s words. “Yeah. I was sort of shit before, wasn’t I?” he asked. Eddie chuckled. “Let’s just put it this way, in comparison to your acts, your childhood jokes were good.” The two men then burst out in laughter together.

“Well, I hope you’ll continue to watch me,” Richie admitted. “Of course,” Eddie agreed. “You’re talking to your biggest fan here. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Richie grinned contently. “Thanks, Eds,” he replied. “That means a lot to me.” 

Richie briefly debated telling Eddie about his plans, but quickly decided against it. He still wasn’t positive that he was going to be allowed to do it. Besides, the whole point was to use his comedy to say what he had never been able to say before. As long as Eddie watched his acts, he would learn soon enough.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The video started out simple enough. Richie looked a little more nervous than normal, but otherwise this appeared to be a comedy show as usual. It even opened with a really painful and stupid joke about Richie’s dick size that made Eddie smile affectionately. Some Richie-isms never seemed to change."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - really bad jokes. If I could write comedy well, I would. Just pretend in your mind that the jokes are actually good here please!

Eddie was not particularly happy with his life the way it was right now. He was sure that some of it came from the pains of readjusting that all the Losers were feeling, but at the moment at least, Eddie was really feeling those pains.

That day had been a particularly long and stressful day for Eddie. At least it seemed like the whole ordeal with his car was over now, but it somehow didn’t really bring any comfort to Eddie. The car issue had at least been a break in the monotony, but now even that was gone.

All Eddie wanted to do now was go home and relax. Unfortunately, that was a luxury that Eddie never seemed to have. As far as Eddie could tell, no matter what he did, Myra always managed to find something to complain about.

Today appeared to be no different. Eddie barely made it in through the front door before Myra appeared before him huffing and puffing about something. “Marty, calm down please,” Eddie protested, desperately trying to get around her so he could at least remove his shoes and make it to the couch.

“I always knew he was a bad influence,” Myra continued, ignoring Eddie’s pleas. “There was just something off about him. Something sick and…” Myra blabbered on. “Who?” Eddie demanded, cutting Myra off. “That comedian. You know, that horrible one you always want to watch for some reason. What’s his face, Richard Toes or something? Anyways, h-“

“Richie Tozier?” Eddie asked, not bothering to hide the excitement in his voice. Myra waved her hand dismissively. “Yeah, him. Anyways, h-“ “Did he perform today?” Eddie pressed on, cutting Myra off again. “Yeah,” Myra confirmed. “H-“ “What show was this on?” Eddie demanded, cutting Myra off once more.

Myra huffed at Eddie’s constant interruptions. “I’m not sure why it matters,” she replied. “Well, I want to watch it, so-“ “Absolutely not!” Myra objected. “I will not have any husband of mine watching that dirty man make a fool out of himself. I don’t want you watching him anymore, do you understand me?” she continued.

Eddie nodded. “Yeah, I got it,” he agreed, forcing his face to appear serious. “I’m sorry for upsetting you, Marty,” he assured her. Myra tutted in content and permitted her husband to finally step out of the threshold and into the house.

The second Eddie made it inside, he shoved past Myra and ran to the bedroom and locked the door. He then ran inside the bathroom and locked that door as well. Finally, he grabbed his phone and looked Richie up. A couple minutes later, he had found a video of the performance and pressed play. He could already hear Myra starting to throw a fit, but he didn’t care. She wouldn’t be able to reach him from there and he wasn’t going to leave until he heard all that Richie had to say.

______

The video started out simple enough. Richie looked a little more nervous than normal, but otherwise this appeared to be a comedy show as usual. It even opened with a really painful and stupid joke about Richie’s dick size that made Eddie smile affectionately. Some Richie-isms never seemed to change.

But it quickly became clear that some things had changed. “Okay, so now that all of your minds are in the gutter, let’s take you all back to my childhood,” Richie said next, causing Eddie’s heart to skip a beat. Richie had never brought up his childhood in his act before. 

“Back then I was just a little Dick and… Hey! I heard laughter! I thought I told you to get your minds out of the gutter! You all a bunch of pedos or something? I was talking about my name here!” Richie continued, eliciting a “beep, beep Richie,” and a laugh from Eddie. God Richie’s sense of humor was dumb, but Eddie loved it anyways.

But he loved it even more as Richie began to tell stories of all his favorite childhood memories. He started simple enough and brought the audience along with him to the barrens. “So here I am,” Richie continued, “this scrawny little runt wearing nothing but my tighty-whities and huge-ass glasses, trying to compensate for my fear of jumping with the most impressive phlegm wad,” Eddie giggled at the memory. “when suddenly this girl we invited earlier shows up, takes a running start, and just jumps on in.” 

Richie paused and smiled fondly, clearly letting himself think back happily on the memory. “So anyways, that was the day I learned that a dick isn’t actually necessary to win a dick measuring contest.”

Both Eddie and the audience burst into laughter. Eddie smiled as he fondly remembered that day. Beverly had really showed all of them up, but they might never have gained to courage to jump without her. It truly was one of the greatest strengths of the Losers. When one of them was brave, it helped the others to be brave too.

And right now Richie was being brave. Eddie smiled and laughed through the act as Richie went on to talk about various other childhood memories. There was something warm and real in Richie’s stories and jokes that had been lacking in previous shows. Eddie hoped this something would stick around from now on.

From outside the bedroom, Eddie could hear Myra’s shouting shift into sobbing, but he just turned up the volume and ignored it. He could deal with her anger later. 

“It really was a miracle that my friends put up with me when I was a kid,” Richie continued, “you couldn’t get one sentence out of me without some sort of dumb joke or shitty voice.” Richie paused for a moment for dramatic effect. “It’s a good thing I’ve grown out of that stuff now,” he then finished. Eddie snorted and rolled his eyes.

“But fortunately, my friends had an excellent way of getting me to shut up,” Richie continued. “Whenever I drove one of them insane, they would just respond with ‘beep, beep, Richie.’ Turns out, that actually helps me a lot now with road rage. Now whenever I hear a car honk at me, I actually shut up instead of getting angry.”

Tears of laughter streamed down Eddie’s cheeks at the mental image. Richie really was incredibly funny when he spoke from the heart.

“And speaking of rage,” Richie said once his audience’s laughter died down, “let me tell you a little bit about my childhood best friend. I think the best way to describe him to you would be to as a Chihuahua. That kid was tiny, adorable, and full of burning rage.” 

Eddie made an obscene gesture towards the Richie in his phone. The two of them would certainly be having words later about Richie’s analogy choice. “But,” Richie added, cutting off the audience laughter, “he was also one of the kindest, bravest, smartest, and most loyal people I ever had the good fortune to meet.” Eddie waited for the punch line, but none came. 

“Sometimes I wish I could go back to those days,” Richie continued, a wistful look forming on his face. “Back to a simpler time in life when I spent my days laughing alongside the people who meant the most to me.” Eddie stared wistfully at his phone in return. “I wish that too Rich,” he whispered.

“But then I remember that those times weren’t always that simple,” Richie said. His face and voice had gone serious in a way it never had during a show before. “Growing up, there was always a part of myself that I had to hide and comedy was always my solution for that. And now even as an adult, I’ve found that that hasn’t really changed.

I must have written a hundred different jokes in preparation for this moment, but ultimately I realized that there really isn’t one that expresses everything I want to say, so I’ll just say it. I can make as many jokes about it as I want to later.”

Richie paused and took a deep breath. He was shaking a little, but had a look of determination on his face.

“I’m gay. Well, bi actually, but I’ve only ever had serious feelings for men. Well, one man. And I’m tired of hiding it. I spent my entire childhood running away from my feelings, but I’m not going to run anymore. And whether or not my favorite little Chihuahua returns my feelings, I’m not ashamed of them anymore. They are what they are and I am what I am,” Richie concluded.

The phone slipped from Eddie’s fingers and clattered to the ground. It was the only sound other than Myra’s sobbing that could be heard. The audience had grown completely silent.

“Just to clarify,” Richie finally said, breaking the silence. “That was a confession about my sexuality, not about bestiality. I realize now that the metaphor might have been a little confusing.” 

And just like that, the spell was broken and the audience was cheering and laughing. The entire room was going nuts. But Eddie simply picked up the phone and held it close. 

“You really did it, Rich,” he whispered. “You actually managed to take charge of your life.” Tears welled up in Eddie’s eyes. Richie had confessed his love for him for all the world to know, yet he had asked for nothing in return. He didn’t ask Eddie to return his feelings or even offer up any tangible evidence of who his Chihuahua might be. 

Eddie knew that Richie would never press him for a response. He knew that he could go the rest of his life without ever admitting to being that Chihuahua and it would be fine. Well, fine with Richie. Eddie wasn’t sure if it would be fine with him.

Eddie had asked Richie about his happiness because he wasn’t happy in his life. He couldn’t remember the last time he was since leaving Derry. He had known for a long time that he didn’t really love Myra, but now he was finally starting to accept why.

Eddie had always been too scared to admit it to himself. He supposed he still was terrified to admit it, but he wasn’t going to let that fear stop him anymore. He and Richie had faced their fears together twice before and come out on top both times. There was no reason why this time had to be any different. 

It was just like what Richie had told him back in the sewer. “I’m braver than I think,” Eddie whispered to himself. He then looked down at the grinning Richie on his phone. “I’m coming for you Rich,” he promised. “Let’s face this fear together too.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Our memories don’t seem to be fading and now we have a public record of our friendship. We’re free from the curse of our past. All that’s left now is a better future.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning - Myra is still a horrible person
> 
> I can’t believe I’m getting this chapter out so quickly, but I’m just so excited by this story!

The second Richie’s act was over, he was in his car driving home. Richie knew that the press would have questions for him, but he honestly didn’t have the capacity to answer them at the moment. The only people who were permitted to contact him right now were the other Losers.

Richie wasn’t sure who had actually seen his show. It wasn’t exactly at prime time, but it was the best he could get. He figured that news would spread eventually. It wasn’t every day that a comedian interrupted his comedy act to come out.

At least the audience reaction had been positive. Richie hadn’t really expected people to openly boo, but he wasn’t sure if he would get cheers either. It honestly felt really good though. It was like a heavy weight had been lifted from his chest.

Around twenty minutes and two drinks later, Richie’s phone buzzed. With a groan, he reached over to check who was calling and was relieved to find a friendly name.

“Bev,” he whimpered as he picked it up. “Hey Richie,” Beverly replied. “Ben and I saw your show today. You-“ “Did I do okay?” Richie asked, cutting Beverly off. “Did I do you guys proud? Was I okay? I didn’t step out of line with my coming out, did I? I mean, I didn’t say his name. You don’t think I hurt him, do you?” he asked, concerned.

“Oh honey!” Beverly exclaimed. “No! No. You were wonderful! I laughed and cried so much watching you. That was one of the sweetest things I’ve ever seen! Ben and I are so proud of you!” 

“That’s right,” Ben piped up from beside Beverly. “That took a lot of courage, but you did an amazing job. Totally gave me a run for my money as the sappy romantic though!” he added with a laugh.

Richie laughed too. “I think I’ve always been as sappy as you. I just hid it behind dick jokes instead of weird history obsessions. I mean, I didn’t write poetry, but I think my ‘sex with your mom’ jokes came pretty close, don’t you?”

Ben and Beverly laughed. “No. Not at all,” Ben replied. Richie let out a sound of mock offense, causing Beverly and Ben to laugh again.

“So have you heard from him yet?” Beverly then asked now that the mood was a little lighter. “Not yet,” Richie admitted. “Well, give it a little time. Unlike me and Ben, Eddie is actually hard at work right now,” Beverly assured him.

“True,” Richie agreed. “We can’t all just go on a romantic vacation right after returning from our clown battle!” Beverly snickered. “I mean, my fashion line is sort of dead now that my husband and I split up. I’ll need to rebuild it from scratch anyways, so why not take a little break? I could sure as hell use it.”

A slight darkness settled over the air. Beverly had just recently escaped an abusive relationship. She was taking things really well, but the pain wasn’t going to fade just like that. And Beverly was the one who had escaped.

“We’re all going to be there for him,” Beverly promised, understanding Richie’s silence. “I know how hard it can be to break away and I understand why you feel like you can’t be the one to talk to him about it, but the rest of us aren’t just going to leave him to his fate. Eddie isn’t alone anymore, okay,” Beverly assured Richie.

“Thanks, Bev,” Richie replied with a slight sniffle. “I’m so happy for you and Ben. You two are such wonderful people and you deserve so much happiness. I’m so glad you’ve found it in each other.” 

“You and Eddie deserve happiness too,” Ben replied. “We all deserve happiness,” Beverly agreed. The three friends shared a moment of silence for their missing Loser. Stan deserved happiness as well.

“One day,” Ben finally said. “Our memories don’t seem to be fading and now we have a public record of our friendship. We’re free from the curse of our past. All that’s left now is a better future.”

Beverly grinned and kissed her boyfriend while Richie laughed. “You really are a hopeless romantic, Ben. But hopefully you’re right.” Ben grinned in return. “I know I am,” he assured Richie. “And your show today only proves it further.”

————

With his mind made up, Eddie finally got up and unlocked the bathroom door. He grabbed a suitcase from his closet and began packing. Other than his clothes and car, there wasn’t really anything Eddie cared about keeping. Most of his shared possessions with Myra were more to her taste anyways.

Eddie knew that leaving could leave him homeless, broke, and jobless. All of his assets were shared with Myra and he wasn’t sure how much he could keep when he walked out on her. But right now, he simply didn’t care.

He would deal with the divorce and lawyers later. He didn’t really mind if he lost almost everything in the process. Nothing mattered to him anymore other than getting to Richie. He couldn’t let the other man slip through his fingers yet again. 

Once his suitcase was full, Eddie finally opened the door to find a puffy-eyed, fuming Myra standing in front of him. “Just where do you think you’re going?” she demanded when she saw his suitcase.

“LA,” Eddie replied simply. “Absolutely not,” Myra objected. “That’s not your choice to make,” Eddie snapped back. “You promised me you wouldn’t go anywhere without me again, Eddie-bear! You promised me you wouldn’t watch that horrible comedian again and I know you just did. Don’t you love me at all? How could you treat me li-“

“No,” Eddie replied coldly. “What?” Myra asked, the pathetic whine in her voice replaced by something harsher. “No, I don’t love you, Myra. I don’t think I’ve ever loved you. And I think we’ve both always known this. Surely you must have realized it by now. I’m not straight, Myra. I’ve never been straight. And even if I was, there’s always been someone else who-“

“No!” Myra snapped. “You are not a homo, Eddie! You’re just sick! But I promised your mom I would take care of you. This is what happens when you leave my side, Eddie-bear. Your diseases start flaring back up again. You just need to let me take care of you and everything will go back to normal. I’ll make sure you get better. You just-“

“Get better?” Eddie screamed. “You think that this is just some sort of disease? Being gay isn’t a disease, Myra. It’s just a part of who I am!”

Myra opened her mouth to respond, but Eddie wasn’t done yet. “And you know what?” he continued. “I don’t care if it is a disease. I’m not afraid of germs anymore. If loving another man makes me sick, then so be it. I’d rather spend the rest of my life diseased than in hiding! Now if you excuse me, I have a comedian to find. This little Chihuahua isn’t running any longer!”

Before Myra could object further, Eddie was out the door and loading his suitcase into his car. Myra ran outside after him, but Eddie ignored her as he climbed into his car. “You’ll regret this, Eddie-bear!” Myra shouted, storming up to Eddie’s window.

Eddie only shook his head. “I’ve been living a life of regret for twenty-seven years. I’m done regretting my decisions.” And with that he rolled down his window and took Myra’s hand. He carefully pressed something inside and closed her fingers around it.

“Take care, Marty,” he told her. “You’re going to be okay without me. You’re free from the promise you made to my mother and you’re free from your promise you made to me.”

Before Myra could protest further, Eddie rolled his window back up and pulled out of the driveway. He wasn’t exactly sure what his plans for the future were, but for now he focused only on driving towards the airport. One way or another, he was getting on the next flight to LA.

————

Although Eddie was long gone, Myra remained standing in the driveway. Her mouth hung open in shock. She couldn’t believe that her Eddie-bear had actually stood up to her like that. 

But when she opened her hand and saw his wedding ring sitting there, she realized it was truly over. Eddie wasn’t going to come running back to her. He had finally broken free.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “How dare someone come to his house and have the audacity to ring his bell. Couldn’t the press wait just a little longer?”

As the hours ticked by, Richie started to wonder if he should just contact Eddie and ask him directly about his show. By this point, both Mike and Bill had also reached out to him to congratulate him, but Eddie had remained silent. 

Richie had to admit that it was really cool to know that all of the Losers were now going out of their way to watch him perform. Richie’s publicity team had always strived to keep him generically likable, but now those six viewers meant more to him than all of his other fans combined.

Not that Richie didn’t care at all about the public’s opinion of him. Despite his better judgment, Richie found himself checking social media for reactions. Most were heartwarmingly positive, but there were certainly plenty of negative ones mixed in there as well.

Oh well. At least Richie’s fanbase would be more aligned to his own values now. He didn’t need the support of people who would hate him for being himself.

With Bill’s encouragement and blessing, Richie also planned on reaching out to Patrica Uris. Stan’s funeral had already happened while the Losers were trying to piece their lives back together, but Richie wanted to do something to honor his friend anyways.

If Patricia was okay with it, Richie was planning on doing a segment on Stan specifically. He had a ton of wonderful memories of the other man and he wanted to solidify them before he ran the risk of forgetting. 

By this point, everyone was pretty sure that their memories weren’t going to be erased by the curse, but memories still faded over time. Richie didn’t ever want Stan to fade away from him again. He was the one thing Richie hadn’t been able to recover from his deadlight vision.

But writing Stan’s act was something for another day and contacting Patricia could wait until morning. He wasn’t even sure if she would want a stupid comedian like him to do something like that. That’s why he had waited until his first bit had made it on TV and his true personality and sense of humor were revealed.

Richie wasn’t really sure if Eddie was okay with what he had done either. It was possible that Eddie had simply not seen his act yet, but it had been out for almost eight hours now and was pretty prevalent online. Even if Eddie was stuck working late that day, he still should have been home and able to go online by now.

Sighing, Richie scrolled through the public reactions once more. He was grateful to his manager for letting him go on a social media blackout for the rest of the day after his act. He was sure that the man was fielding all sorts of questions and comment requests.

Despite his initial anger at Richie’s disappearance, when Richie had come to his manager with trembling hands and handwritten jokes, the man had been surprisingly supportive. Of course, Richie knew that he would eventually have to face the press himself, but he was glad that it could wait until later.

He just really wanted to hear from Eddie before he talked to anyone. If Eddie was unhappy with what he had done, he didn’t want to make things worse. And if Eddie was happy with it, well, Richie didn’t want to let himself dream about that. It would be too hard to go back to reality if he did.

Yet as the minutes continued to tick on, Richie found himself staring longingly at Eddie’s text stream more and more. In his head, he imagined the little dots of a message appearing. Or better yet, his phone starting to vibrate while Eddie’s name appeared at the top. Only, neither that message nor that call ever came.

Eventually Richie fell into an uneasy sleep, his phone cradled in his arms. 

————

A few hours later, Richie was awakened by an obnoxiously loud buzzing coming from outside his house. His head throbbed painfully from a combination of stress, lack of sleep, and alcohol. 

Realizing that he had fallen asleep, Richie quickly checked his messages, but the only new one he had was from his manager informing him that it was okay to take the rest of that day off as well, but that he would need to face the press the next day.

Richie sighed miserably before jumping at that stupid noise again. This time he recognized it as his doorbell and felt a surge of anger. How dare someone come to his house and have the audacity to ring his bell. Couldn’t the press wait just a little longer?

Richie intended to just wait it out until they gave up and went away, but whoever was out there started ringing the bell over and over again.

Burning with rage, Richie stormed over to the door and threw it open. “Go a-“ Richie’s words were cut off as a warm body collided with his chest and threw its arms around him.

“Eddie?” Richie gasped, staring down in shock at the man clinging onto him. “Richie!” Eddie sobbed, burying his face into Richie’s chest. 

“Eddie!” Richie cried in delight. “Is it really you? Am I dreaming? Are you really here right now?” He asked, a mixture of laughter and tears distorting his words.

“I’m here Rich,” Eddie sobbed into him. “I’m here and I’m real and I... I love you Rich. I love you so, so much. I’ve loved you for years now. I’m sorry it took me so long to realize it.”

Richie stood still in shock. “Eddie?” he whimpered in confusion. “Richie,” Eddie whispered back. The softness of their voices reminded Richie of when Eddie was impaled, yet It wasn’t here right now and wouldn’t be coming back. It was dead and Eddie was alive. 

“Eddie!” Richie cried out once more, finally realizing that this was real. “Eddie! Eddie! Eddie! Eddie! Eddie!” Richie began to sob in earnest now as he grabbed onto the other man and spun him around. “Eddie. What are you doing here? How did you get here?”

“I flew here, Richie. I left Myra and I flew here. I wanted to be with you. Look,” Eddie said, holding up his hand. A thin band of skin lighter than the rest of his hand was visible on his ring finger.

“Your wedding ring,” Richie realized. Eddie nodded. “We’re not officially divorced yet, but I’m not going back to her. I don’t have to stay here with you if you don’t want me to, but I’m not going back to Myra again. It’s time I admit to myself who I really am.”

Richie spun Eddie around once more. “You stay here as long as you like,” he told him. “You stay here for the rest of your life if you want. I’d certainly love it if you did.”

Eddie chuckled. “I didn’t realize you were so eager to adopt a dog, Rich.” Richie looked at him in confusion for a moment before realizing what Eddie was talking about and laughing.

“You’re not mad that I called you a Chihuahua?” he asked. Eddie laughed too. “Oh no. I’m absolutely furious. We’re going to have a few words about that one later,” Eddie said, his voice growing serious.

Before Richie could panic and apologize, Eddie’s face broke back out into a grin and he started to laugh. “You really are an idiot, Richie, but I love you and your stupid comments and nicknames. And there are so many worse things I could be called. Anyways, what you said was actually pretty cute. In a stupid sort of way, of course.”

Richie grinned. “Never change Eds, okay? Promise me you’ll never lose that fire and snark.” Eddie nodded. “I promise Rich. Now stop calling me Eds. You know I hate it,” he complained. Richie laughed. “No can do, Eds! You literally just told me you like it! You’re stuck with my stupid nicknames for you from now on!”

“Heaven forbid!” Eddie cried out in mock anguish. He and Richie both laughed. Then, before Richie knew what was happening, he was kissing Eddie. Only this time there was no dirt or grime, just tears of joy. And this time he wasn’t the one who initiated it. 

The two men leaned into each other and held on for dear life. Neither wanted this moment to ever end. They were finally together, just the way it was supposed to be. 

And when the two Lo(s̶)vers finally pulled apart for air, it was with a fierce reluctance. “God, you’re such a good kisser,” Eddie informed Richie once he had finally caught his breath. “Oh yeah?” Richie asked, still panting a little.

“Maybe,” Eddie replied, a sly smile slowly spreading across his lips. “I might need to kiss you again to make sure.” 

Richie laughed then closed the gap between them once more. This time, however, he let the kiss go a little slower and gentler. He no longer needed to desperately cling to Eddie’s lips while they were there. Even after they pulled away, Richie now knew that they would be back again for more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost at the end! All that’s left now is an epilogue to tie up the rest of the loose ends. I can’t believe how quickly I’ve gotten this out there! I just love these boys so much and have to make sure they find their happiness!


	8. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “And even though the Losers club as a whole would never return to the way it was when they were kids, the six remaining members would carry around those bonds for the rest of their lives.”

When Bill called Richie up to complain about the press, Richie only laughed at him. Apparently people had gotten wind that his movie ending was going to be different from the one in his book and now the press was going nuts for a comment.

And while Richie sympathized with Bill’s plight at least a little, it was clear that Bill was being overdramatic on purpose just to get a rise out of him. 

Richie was only just finally regaining a sense of peace and normalcy in his life after his big coming out moment. The press had gone crazy over his performance and even crazier over his announcement of a boyfriend.

For the most part, Richie had kept Eddie out of the spotlight. They both knew there was no total escape from it, but there was no need to flaunt Eddie around like a shiny new toy.

Besides, poor Eddie already had his hands full with his divorce. Eddie claimed that he didn’t really care much about the division of assets, but Richie had still made sure that he had a good lawyer on his side. And while nothing was finalized yet, things did seem to be looking up. 

In addition to his divorce, Eddie was also dealing with his new job search. Since Richie made a decent amount of money as a comedian, Eddie didn’t technically need to seek out a new job, but he wasn’t the sort of person who would just sit around and accept favors from other people, even if he was dating said other person.

However, Eddie did agree to accept Richie’s help until he could find a job he would be happy with. While Richie had been a total dick about it, Eddie had to admit that sometimes it really did feel like his current job was invented before fun.

As of the moment, Eddie was leaning towards becoming a pediatrician. It would require him to go back to school, but with Richie supporting him, Eddie knew that wasn’t really a problem. Eddie had a lifetime of experience with both doctors and saving kids, so pediatrician seemed like the perfect fit for him.

But he would worry about that after his divorce was finalized and Richie’s life became a little less chaotic. There were already a lot of changes in both of their lives at the moment and it did cause occasional friction between them.

But no amount of friction could ever hold up against the burning love Eddie and Richie felt for one another. The two of them had faced murderous clown monsters and internal demons for each other. What was a tiny squabble about dishes or bed sides in comparison to that?

No, for the most part, Eddie and Richie were happier than they had ever been before. There was still a lingering sadness all the Losers felt over Stanley’s loss, but even that was a little easier now.

Patrica had been more than receptive over Richie’s idea to dedicate an act to Stan and the public had absolutely adored his stories and jokes. Richie had flown Patricia and the rest of the Loser in to watch him live and there had not been a dry eye between them.

This reunion of the Losers club had been much happier than the one in Derry. Bill and Mike teased Ben, Beverly, Richie, and Eddie pretty relentlessly for the constant doey eyes the couples were making at each other, but it was all in good fun.

There were cheers all around when Mike announced that he had finally decided to move out of Derry and would be moving closer to Bill. Mike had spent twenty seven years looking out for the other Losers and they were all thrilled to know he was finally looking out for himself. 

Bill also gleefully told everyone about the next book he had begun to write. He hadn’t actually written the ending yet, but he knew in his heart that it would be a happy one. He had always worried that happy endings would make his stories seem unrealistic, but he no longer felt that way. How could he when he was living one right now?

And even though the Losers club as a whole would never return to the way it was when they were kids, the six remaining members would carry around those bonds for the rest of their lives.

So as Richie got off the phone with Bill, it was with a fond smile that he returned to his previous task. “Hey Eds!” he called out into the kitchen. “Yes Trashmouth?” Eddie called back, popping his head out into the hallway.

“I think I found the perfect one!” he said excitedly, holding his computer screen up. Eddie chuckled and got closer. “She is pretty adorable,” he agreed. 

“So what do you think Eds?” Richie asked, excitedly bouncing up and down. “Should we adopt her?” Eddie grinned as he sat down beside his boyfriend. “Sure Chee,” he agreed. “But on one condition, okay?” 

Richie crossed his arms and pouted. “I still don’t know what you have against the name I picked out. I really think all the other Losers would love it!”

Eddie threw his hands up in frustration. “For the last time, Dickwad, I am not naming our dog Puppywise!” A vein throbbed a little in Eddie’s forehead, prompting Richie to kiss it.

Eddie let out an exasperated sigh, but settled down next to Richie nonetheless. “You really are an idiot, you know that Chee?” he asked affectionately. Richie nodded and leaned in for a kiss.

“I know, but I’m your idiot, Eds, so it’s all good.” “Damn right you are,” Eddie agreed leaning into the kiss. “Come on, babe,” he said gently once they had pulled apart. “Lets go adopt ourselves a puppy.”

Richie pumped his fists in the air for joy and followed Eddie out to the car. His life really was starting to go perfectly. And he could already picture Eddie’s face when he showed him the new dog collar, engagement ring dangling merrily where the name tag would eventually go. 

“Yup,” Richie thought to himself. “I truly am the luckiest man alive!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that’s it! I feel sort of sad now that it’s over, but at least I now have this happy world to return to when I get sad thinking about the movie ending! Thank you all for coming on this ride with me!


End file.
